Entitlement Issues

As of the past 2 weeks, Chloe has developed some major entitlement issues, and it is quite a sight to behold! Everything exists for her exploration and her amusement…absolutely EVERYTHING! The clementine I am eating–it’s Chloe’s. The telephone I am trying to talk to daddy on–Chloe’s. The toilet bowl–also Chloe’s. Ryleigh’s fur–you guessed it, Chloe’s! Her curiosity is endearing, but the fits that follow if you do not hand over her object of desire are incredible. These said fits range from a small squeal of anger (imagine an angry pig) to an all out throwing herself on the ground, stomping her feet and screaming (imagine an angry banshee).

While laughing and watching Chloe throw her ridiculous tantrums, I have once again been struck by the realization that she and I are all too similar. I feel as if I am entitled to much–a comfortable life, peace of mind, my own time, feeling love towards and from all my fellow Christians…the list goes on and on. And, like Chloe, I do not behave attractively if my self-proclaimed rights are not met. I do throw tantrums (ask my husband), but most often I express my unhappiness in a more civilized manner: by harboring bitterness, anxiety, jealousy or insecurity (all beautiful qualities, of course).

Yet when I look to God’s word, there is no mention of my “rights.” There are promises of fruits of the Spirit, peace and comfort from God, but these gifts are not given in the way that I feel I deserve them–at my demand and without restraint. And because of this, I have found that I fear to lay my life in the hands of an untamed God and allow Him to do as He pleases. He does not promise me an easy life, and that thought is uncomfortable to me. He does promises Christ, and honestly, this thought is often uncomfortable to me as well. My heart and mind fear trading in my rights for Christ. Unlike the writers of the Bible, I have yet to fully embrace Him as life and life more abundantly. Yet, in Christ, there is LIFE, not to mention peace, joy, love, comfort, companionship…but it comes by resting in Him and rejoicing in Him–not as a pay out of something I have merited.

So, instead of growing embittered by what I feel I deserve, I am going to be thankful for the daily blessings that I don’t: like another day with Jeremy and Chloe, a roof over my head, clothes to wear in my closet, clean water, a good night’s sleep, a family who loves me… I am going to sing of the love of Christ that has given me this and more. And when I come to bumps in the road, I am going to praise Him all the more, knowing that these momentary sufferings are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed.

Lord, help me to surrender my rights and to embrace You.